I'm finding out that here "in the big city", its hard to find a friend. Maybe my definition of a friend is too detailed and too strict. Maybe these kind of friendships just don't exist any more. I guess I'm patterning my ideal friend after my life-long friend Marsha. Marsha and I have been friends since 1st grade. We lived together at college. I would visit her in Kansas City. I can call her any time and we will pick up right where we left off. I'm looking for that kind of friend here.
Don't get me wrong - I know people here that I am friendly with and who are friendly with me in return. But that's different. I've even had coffee with "friends" and had dinner out with "the girls" - but still.... it just isn't the same.
This caused me to examine just what I think a friend is. There were a couple of important aspects that are lacking right now and there are things that I just desire out of a friendship.
1) A friend calls me sometimes (not always me calling them). I'd like to be called just to chat. I'd like to be called to be asked for a favor. I'd like to be asked out for coffee or to go shopping.
2) A friend is someone who shares secrets or desires or ambitions. Someone who wants your opinion. Someone who is trusted.
3) A friend is someone you can laugh with... hard. Belly-laugh. Laugh until the milk comes out of your nose.
4) A friend prays for you and asks for your prayers in return.
5) You should be able to ask you friend "Do I look fat in this?" and she can tell you "Yes my dear, you sure do!"
Its a busy world we live in. A lot of my acquaintences are younger and still have children at home to take care of, car pools to be a part of and homework to help with. I'm not annoyed with a single person. I'm not sad or upset with anybody. I just hope that someday I run into another person like Marsha... or Chelsie... or Rachael. I want somebody like them right here. I'll be patient.
3 comments:
My Mudder. Yes patience. The hard thing about friends is that for some reason is just takes time. Not that it helps right now, but those qualities in friends develop over time...you know...
Sheryl, I just stumbled on your blog. I love the scripture at the top of your page. Mind if I copy the idea? My favorite is Jeremiah 29:11. I am single with no children. I moved away from my hometown almost two years ago and I know exactly how you feel. It's hard to make new friends. My best friend is Helen. I have asked God to give me a Helen here but I haven't found her yet. I will pray that God will send you the right person. I just started learning about blogs yesterday so hope this is the right way to do this. I'm adding you to my prayer list right now!
glorydaze.... thank you. I will add you to my prayer list as well - that God will provide a "Helen" for you. You may of course put scripture at the top of your blog - I saw it on someone elses as well and just loved it. Let me know the title of your blog - its fun to keep track of people and their life progress! Blessings to you!
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